Enjoy this episode & transcript below where Kimberly Spencer, Master NLP Mindset & Communications Coach and CEO of Communication Queens, interviews Shelley Golden, the founder and CEO of Shelley Golden Style. She is a professional stylist who works with not only styling you for the stage so that you can improve your confidence and authority and credibility, but also that credibility when you are on zooms for a long time during the day, whether you're in person or on screen, it has to translate as well.

 

In this episode of the Crown Yourself podcast, host Kimberly Spencer interviews Shelley Golden, a professional stylist and image consultant. Shelley shares her expertise on creating a professional image for Zoom meetings, focusing on aspects such as camera angle, lighting, sound, and clothing. She provides practical tips like wearing glasses with contrasting frames or defining eyebrows to draw attention to the eyes. Shelley also emphasizes the importance of setting up the Zoom box effectively to allow for body language reading. The discussion further covers the significance of lighting, color, and background setup in creating a standout presence on Zoom. Shelley also shares her five-step process for Zoom makeovers.

FYI Transcripts may contain a few typos. With many episodes lasting 30-minutes, it can be difficult to catch minor errors. Enjoy!

Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podcast Addict, Castbox, Amazon Music, iHeart Radio, Pandora, Youtube, or on your favorite podcast platform.

 

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Kimberly Spencer (00:00:00) - Hello my fellow sovereigns, and welcome back to another episode of the Crown Yourself podcast. If you have ever wanted to up your professional game and you see these podcasters or YouTubers with these epic backgrounds and you're like, not quite sure how to design yours or what to do with yours or how to look professional. I have got a guest for you. I have had so many clients come to me where as we start to do the transformational work on the inside, the external transformation starts to ensue and the external environment ends up having to change. Whether that means that they become a little bit more professional, or they want to give up their background or something, or they want to just appear congruent with what they have going on on the inside along with the outside. And that is why I have referred so many of my clients to Shelley Golden, the founder and CEO of Shelley Golden Style. She is a professional stylist who works with not only styling you for the stage so that you can improve your confidence and authority and credibility, but also that credibility when you are on zooms for a long time during the day, whether you're in person or on screen, it has to translate as well.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:01:24) - And if you have bikes hanging behind you or like your kids, like, you know, as lovely as they are your kids designs, maybe that may not be in alignment with your professional buttoned up business business persona. Whatever it is, you want to make sure that who you are on the inside is translating into your style and who you're expressing yourself on the outside, whether that's in-person or on a zoom. And so in this episode, this is one that I will also highly recommend that you watch on our YouTube channel. We do put these episodes up in video format on our YouTube channel, and this is definitely one that you can listen to while you're doing the things. Make your notes and then go watch the YouTube channel version, which we'll leave in the description because you will see what Shelley is talking about in this episode to a whole new degree. And if you learn, like me, through a visual representational system where you need to see the visuals, then this is going to be incredibly valuable for you to listen to this podcast episode, absorb, kind of get that picture in your mind, and then go get the references of the pictures of like, what Shelley is talking about.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:02:38) - So I encourage you to enjoy this podcast episode. Take notes if you are not driving or doing something else, or if you have the moment to make a quick little note in your notes on your iPhone and make a note to go watch this on YouTube so that you can get that visual reference guide. Shelley has been an executive presence, image consultant and fashion stylist for 20 years in Chicago, Amsterdam and San Francisco. She is now based in San Francisco and Silicon Valley, and has a keen eye to help her clients improve their confidence and credibility and create an image that sets them apart, both online and off. I am so excited to bring you this interview with a woman that I have referred to so many clients, and with that I give you Shelley Golden. Welcome to the Crown Yourself podcast, where together we build your empire and transform your subconscious stories about what's possible for your business, body, and life. I'm your host, Kimberly Spencer, founder of Crown Yourself, and I'm a master mindset coach, best selling author, TEDx speaker known to my clients as a game changer.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:03:48) - Each week you get the conscious leadership strategies you need to help you reign with courage, clarity and confidence so that you too can make the income and impact you deserve. Imagine this podcast as your royal invitation to step into your full potential and reign in your divine purpose. Your sovereignty starts here and your reign is now. I am so excited to be here with you and our guest, Shelley Golden, who has already been correcting my Airbnb backdrop. Why I'm so excited, Shelley, to have you on. I was like, I'm going to have the Zoom Makeover Queen on my podcast. I have to have a proper backdrop, even though I am recording from our Airbnb in Austin, Texas, in a little modular home. And so I was pulling everything that I could based off of just our conversations that we've had, of having a piece of art and having a plant and having these, these little pieces. And Shelley has already been adjusting the background for me, just giving me some guidance on that. And so, Shelley, first of all, before we dive into the details, I'd love to know what got you in to specifically zoom a.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:04:59) - You're so brilliant at it.

 

Shelley Golden (00:05:02) - Oh, you know, it's one of those funny things that I didn't think about it. It just happened. So here's the story. Two weeks before my California shut down. I live in California, as was other states shut down as well. I went to my last in-person networking lunch, and at that lunch I met a woman and she's like, hey, let's do a workshop together and thought, sure, let's do a workshop together. I can do that. Well, our first day to talk about it was the day California closed. It's like, oh, well, I guess it's not going to be an in-person workshop. And I said, well, I get help. People look good and feel confident in their in their zoom box. It's only for six weeks. And we ended up having a three workshops with 200 people signing up. And I realized, wow, people really are getting value out of this. So I thought, you know what? I'm going to just run with it.

 

Shelley Golden (00:05:57) - And so I created this five step process. So Cameron, camera angle, lighting, sound, background, what color clothing works best on you in your space, and even zoom specific makeup techniques? Because I've always been in the I help you look good business, so I'm just continuing that I help you look good business in your little zoom box. So that's kind of that's how it started.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:06:26) - And you have worked with some of my clients as well, helping them grab their zoom box. And so what is the first thing when you're looking at the zoom box? Because you said camera and camera angle, do you find what is the biggest problem that you see most people have when they start their zooming? Is it lack of light? Is it camera?

 

Shelley Golden (00:06:47) - It's basically a combination. So lighting is the most important thing. You know, if you're not well lit, it's hard to hurt for people to see you. It hard for them to engage with you. And how do you build trust and credibility if they can't really see your eyes? Right.

 

Shelley Golden (00:07:03) - You know, that's kind of the, the, the magic of in person. So I try to create this what feels like you're just sitting on the other side of the table having a conversation. So lighting is the most important thing. And also I try I mean, there's lots of little details, but I look at the whole thing is a painting. I lived in Amsterdam for ten years, and one of the things that I was lucky enough to do when I lived in Amsterdam was study European artists in the Dutch masters in particular. So when they're creating their paintings like Rembrandt and Vermeer, why is it that everybody looks at the same spot on the painting first and then your eye everybody's? I kind of goes to this second spot, so that's what I try to do. I try to create a center focus, which happens to be your eyes. So that everything in the painting, which is your zoom box, is focusing in and angling and pointing to your eyes. So then that's where people are looking.

 

Shelley Golden (00:08:11) - And if they can't see your eyes because the lighting's not good. Then there's distractions. So I try to eliminate the distractions.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:08:18) - And eyes are the window of the soul. So in that are.

 

Shelley Golden (00:08:21) - Are.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:08:22) - How we build trust is by looking at people on the eyes. And so one of the things that I mean from, from my background training and on camera acting from decades ago, the so many people mistake looking at themselves versus actually looking and communicating with the camera with that challenge. Because sometimes we either like to see ourselves or we like to look like we're we like to look like we're looking at the person, but sometimes we forget that there is. The camera is actually three inches higher. How do we adjust in our zoom box to accommodate for that? Aside from just like looking awkwardly in into the camera when we want to look at the person, it's.

 

Shelley Golden (00:09:04) - A that's a great question and it's really simple. Some people might find it a little bit distracting, but it actually helps you focus and helps helps people focus on you because they feel it makes them feel like you're looking at them.

 

Shelley Golden (00:09:19) - So if you have your entire zoom window opened up to your entire computer or tablet screen, you're looking at this entire screen. So personally, I have a big monitor sitting on my desk, but what I and I have a separate Logitech camera on top of my monitor, so that sets the stage. I have a big monitor with a camera set on top. I would say half the people who are zooming have a monitor with a camera perched on top. But the trick is, it feels like you're looking at the camera. It's take your entire zoom window and make it one sixth in size directly under the camera. Okay. So the whole zoom window is only taking up a this top center one sixth of your whole monitor, whether it's your entire laptop screen, your tablet screen. So this forces you to look. Top center, which is directly under your camera. So it's really difficult to discern whether you're looking at the camera one inch lower at yourself and two inches lower at the person. It's not as though you've got six inches between the camera and the person, like on the left.

 

Shelley Golden (00:10:51) - That's when you're when you're when you really have to move your eyes more than just a little bit. That's when the distortion and the, the feeling that it's not like you're not looking in the camera is happening.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:11:06) - Shelley, I think one of the things that I just love about you and the work that you do is that you are so fastidious when it comes to the details, and it's these micro adjustments that when you make them, make them macro completely different. Like literally I just moved my zoom for recording this, and I already feel the difference and the difference in connection by just not having you blown up completely all over my screen and having you up higher, I wouldn't change it. Just change it. Yeah, yeah, I'm very coachable. I take immediate advice.

 

Shelley Golden (00:11:42) - I don't know that you can immediately. Your eyes are now only moving in this very tiny little area. Yeah. So yeah, I can feel the difference that I.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:11:52) - Have eyes to. Yeah.

 

Shelley Golden (00:11:54) - So even if you're looking at yourself or you're looking at me, it doesn't really matter.

 

Shelley Golden (00:11:57) - Your eyes still are more or less within the same area. So. So that's that's how to help get people to focus on you. Another way to get people to focus on your eyes is a combination of two different things. One, you could actually put on glasses that have a contrasting colored frame to your face. So don't wear like rimless glasses or kind of silver or gold if you actually have a contrast frame, which is very fashionable right now, it helps people focus in on you so that it creates a bull's eye. If you don't wear glasses. I'm. I'm trying to bring up a if you can let me share my screen so that you could see what I am had. If you do not wear glasses, you want to have your eyebrows be defined, whether that's with an eyebrow pencil to give them a bull's eye. Give them a place to create the top part of the bull's eye so that people have a place to look. So either pencil in your eyebrows or there's also zoom eyebrows, which you can do with your.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:13:15) - Eyebrows.

 

Shelley Golden (00:13:16) - Hair, eyebrows. So I just so Kimberly can see, I put up an image of a woman wearing glasses without a frame. Versus a woman wearing glasses with a very distinctive contrasting colored frame. And we also changed her, tweaked her background and her clothing and.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:13:42) - The clothing and the angle of the camera as well.

 

Shelley Golden (00:13:44) - Yes. And so it's little tiny tweaks. But when you're looking at this woman specifically, we're talking about glasses here. Like you, you look right at her eyes because it's like, oh, I could see where your eyes are. You're telling them this is where I want you to look?

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:14:03) - Oh, I love that, Shelley. And then I think. When it comes to painting that picture around as far as what we're creating, what you create inside the zoom box. I mean, like I said, literally when I hopped on, I told Shelley, I said, I'm at an Airbnb. I did the best that I could with our backdrop and but I wanted I have a zoom queen.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:14:26) - Come on. I got a I gotta have a look. Good. And she was like, move this picture over here. And I loved that you explained the difference because I originally had the horse picture over on this side, so there was a lot of white blending. But then you said, move it over here and it does frame my head better. So looking at that, those tiny details, what are the common mistakes that you see most people make outside of the frame and where their eyeballs go and their their eyes? What are the other most common mistakes that you see with people's zoom boxes?

 

Shelley Golden (00:15:04) - Okay, one of the the the top mistake that I see that is the easiest to correct is you want to have your head literally a couple inches from the top of the zoom box. You want to have your chest showing. You don't want to just have your face being a floating head at the bottom of the box. You want people to see your head, your neck, your shoulders, and your chest.

 

Shelley Golden (00:15:33) - For women, I say kind of above the nipple line. Men can actually go down to their diaphragm. And the reason you want this much body showing so as much as possible. So it just looks like we're sitting on the other side of the table having a conversation so that they can read your body language, because that's the biggest. Difficulty that creates zoom fatigue is if we can't reach read other people's body language, we're actually using more cognitive energy to try to figure out what it is that they're actually saying. If you can't see somebody's foot tapping and leg moving and their fingers moving, you can't see if they're nervous, if they're calm, if they're creating power poses the way they're sitting with their hands and their legs. But if at least if they could see your upper chest, they can read more of your body language to keep your head like, literally like an inch or two. I have a little trick on how to position yourself, so I'll talk the listeners through. Yeah. If you take your hands and make like a like I pledge allegiance pledge.

 

Shelley Golden (00:16:47) - If you take your hand like that, squish your fingers together. Now keep your finger, your palm facing the camera. Put it smacked on top of your head. Now, if you could see a couple fingers in the zoom picture and a couple fingers out of the zoom picture, you're in a good position. If you see your entire hand and then some. Bring the camera down. Angle it further down to cause your head to appear higher up.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:17:17) - I think that also. I mean it could because you speak to communication. I love that you mentioned that it takes more cognitive processing power for us to be able to read somebody, because 55% of our communication is physiological. And when you can see the top, like what you just said made so much sense from my coaching perspective, because then you can see the chest and you can see how we breathe. And so it's completely an unconscious process. But when you see someone breathing and you see their lungs like if they're getting nervous, like you can see that and you can feel that from somebody, but you don't see that up.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:17:56) - It's just like like they're like a potato. The like, they don't see it on.

 

Shelley Golden (00:18:02) - I call those floating heads. It's like I'm floating my head just above the box.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:18:07) - Yeah, but you can actually get into deeper rapport with somebody because unconsciously we are reading each other's body language and especially our breathing patterns. And you can see if someone's more stressed or if they're tired or if they're, you know, like just kind of letting go a bit because of how they're breathing. And you see that if you're up from the the nipples up.

 

Shelley Golden (00:18:31) - Right, right. And the reality is the whole thing is what sets you apart from the guy in the zoom box next to you. You know, that's the whole question. If they can see you, if they could get some feeling out of you, if they could, if you create trust and credibility because they could see you, they could hear you. You're they could see your face. You're well lit. They could see your eyes. They could read your lips.

 

Shelley Golden (00:18:56) - I often say to women, wear lipstick because it creates the bottom part of that upper bull's eye. Your eyebrows and glass frames create the upper part of the bull's eye, and your lips create the bottom part of the bull's eye so people can read your lips. Rather doing lipstick. So there's zoom eyebrows and zoom lipstick. So I often have people put zoom lipstick on just ever so slightly to give them. I did with your client Kalpa. Matter of fact, she doesn't normally wear a lipstick, but we put a little bit of zoom lipstick on her, just to give a little definition from her lips to again create a bull's eye point for people to look at so people can read her lips. And it helps with all the cognitive additional work. It just makes it easier.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:19:56) - I never would have thought that lipstick, I never would have put it together, but it makes so much sense now that you said it. That lipstick would help create the decreased cognitive strain. Who knew?

 

Shelley Golden (00:20:11) - Yeah. And it's.

 

Shelley Golden (00:20:12) - And the funny thing is, is all these tiny little things. But once all those little pieces are in place, you know, it's like, think of it like a television set, you know, or I'm thinking of this as a painting. All the little details should support the main event. It should tell the story. The branding. Who you are, what message you want to get across. Are you a cluttered person? Are you a clean and neat person? If hypothetically, you create websites for people and you have a really cluttered house, well, maybe you're if you're talking to somebody for an initial conversation, they might think, oh, that person doesn't have the simplicity in general that I'm looking for. So you need to tell your story with your branding in a way that feels comfortable, that, most importantly, does not have distractions. So what are distractions? I was.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:21:09) - Just about to ask you that.

 

Shelley Golden (00:21:11) - Question. I'm so glad you asked. So, so distractions are things that will pull your eye away from the other person's eye.

 

Shelley Golden (00:21:24) - Such as. I came on to this podcast with Kimberly and she has a guess. It's an image of a horse. There's a horse, it's a hearse for a skull, and then there's a skull underneath. But we've got an image of the force, and one of the fractions is sometimes when there's another face or there's other eyes, those are distractions. At the beginning of Covid, I sat at my dining room table and I have a one of my favorite paintings. It's a I got it in Vietnam. I call it my Vietnamese Princess. And it was distracting because there were two eyes also in addition to my two eyes, and said it was distracting. It's like, oh, which face am I looking at? Even though they know it's a painting, but it's distracting. Another thing that's distracting is reflections. Reflections on glass. Diplomas. Certificates. Nobody can read them anyhow. Uh, artwork that has glass distractions. Sometimes shiny jewelry is distraction. Sometimes men's bald heads are. There's there's reflections off of their the top of their head because they don't have any hair.

 

Shelley Golden (00:22:47) - Yeah. Sometimes if there's a light above their head and it's shining on their forehead, it looks like a distraction because it looks like a headlight. So you got.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:22:57) - To powder it a little.

 

Shelley Golden (00:22:57) - Bit or we diffuse the light. Okay. Uh, either we turn the light off, we angle it differently, or I put like a you can put, like a little cover over it to diffuse some of the light.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:23:11) - So since light is one of the most important factors and I know that from, from my, you know, background in, in Hollywood early on, the key thing is key back film.

 

Shelley Golden (00:23:23) - Right.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:23:24) - So of of creating light do you think in terms of lighting like that or is there additional lighting. Is really that that key light the most important? How do you think of the luminosity of your painting that you create?

 

Shelley Golden (00:23:38) - Well, just like a painting, you of a foreground mid-ground and a background. So yes, that is absolutely vital. Like what is your background? Is it too light? Is it too dark? Do you have dark furniture? Do you have light furniture right now? If you're looking as a son, I have a new sofa.

 

Shelley Golden (00:23:57) - For some reason, it's just appearing really neon white. Even though I have my blinds completely closed. I am in a in a not a dark room, but my blinds are closed completely on a on a sliding glass door. But back to the point of backlight. But I am sitting with at my computer. I have a monitor and it's against the wall. Find me on the other side of my living room. I have a brown Chinese wooden cabinet which I have a spotlight on, and I was going to ask.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:24:37) - Is there an additional light on that? Because that's what it looks like.

 

Shelley Golden (00:24:40) - Right? So if I did not have a spotlight on this dark cabinet behind me, it would look like a really dark cabinet. And I have dark hair and light in it, so I would not pop in as in the foreground of my painting. Because I'm creating a painting, I would blend in with the background. So it's very important to differentiate the foreground. And I don't want to get too technical on this, but yes, lighting in the back makes a big difference what color painting I do.

 

Shelley Golden (00:25:17) - What color is the wall behind you? That all makes a difference.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:25:21) - Yeah, so obviously having some sort of contrast between your hair color, your skin color, and the backdrop behind you so that you pop and you stand out center stage.

 

Shelley Golden (00:25:31) - Correct?

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:25:32) - That's right. Now, have you always had this level of attention to detail? It's so brilliant because you see things that are that could seem minute, but like in the master work, you're like, oh my gosh, that's that's it makes it stand out. Have you always been this detail oriented in your work?

 

Shelley Golden (00:25:57) - Um, sure. You know, it's not like I've been doing zoom makeovers from, you know, for for years, but in, in, like.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:26:07) - You're in their branding work since you've been in the business of people looking good for years, I know that you have studied color palettes and color tones as far as, like what really allows people to shine in their in their beauty for what helps them stand out.

 

Shelley Golden (00:26:21) - Yeah, I'm a detail person for sure.

 

Shelley Golden (00:26:25) - I love understanding how things what you can do to create an effect. Mm. What can you do? Oh my gosh, my alarm is going off in another bedroom. I guess I'm going to just have to, I don't know. You're on a level one. Can we stop the podcast? I'm sorry.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:26:51) - Don't worry. So I have a fantastic editor. She will make us look extraordinary. I mean, we're extraordinary. We're fabulous queens. But do you want to the.

 

Shelley Golden (00:27:01) - Let's see, we were talking about.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:27:04) - Your your background with colors and brand. So in this journey of how you've come to, to specialize in a very particular niche of zoom makeovers, it's been a journey, though to get here, and it seems like you also have a lot of travel influence that has influenced all the different style that you bring to the table and influences also what you do with your clients?

 

Shelley Golden (00:27:29) - Yes. So I am fourth or fifth generation in the fashion and clothing business, so it's always, always been there.

 

Shelley Golden (00:27:38) - You know, it's a little girl. I couldn't go out if I didn't look good according to my mom, because I was I called myself her little fit, her little fashionista in training. So I started from a pretty early age. I actually studied textiles in college. So you know what? How do things feel and how do you how do they lay and how do they how do they show up in art? I designed costumes for theater. I used to teach history of costume and fashion design school. I am a certified color consultant doing color palettes for people's clothing, branding, business colors, interior colors, which really creates a you need a really keen eye for that. But keep in mind I did really great in geometry. In school. Algebra was not my friend geometry. I could see the shapes and you know, if you have color differentiation, that was easy. You know, algebra was a completely different story. But um, just going back. Yeah. So also I lived in Amsterdam for ten years, and I was lucky enough when I lived there too.

 

Shelley Golden (00:28:46) - I actually joined the American Women's Club. And one thing that they did every single month is they hired an art docent to take us to an art exhibition, architectural walking tours, little villages. And I really, really learned about European art and Dutch Dutch artists in particular, including Rembrandt and Premiere and and how is it that you're, again, that your eye starts in one position and then moves to a different position? Another thing that they use that I use when I am doing zoom makeovers. I also have been creating custom branded virtual backgrounds. Um, is they use subliminal lines. And that's what I was actually using with Kimberly when before we started the interview podcast. Oh my goodness. As she mentioned, she had this painting with a white background next to the white door, but I wanted to balance out the white so that she was between the two pieces of white, so that she would stand out and be framed by the two white pieces, which you are, and you actually appear more in the foreground.

 

Shelley Golden (00:29:59) - And you, you know, as if you were like, position yourself between white, two white bookshelves, you know, you're you're framing yourself. So I take all of that and put it together and it actually just comes pretty damn easy to me.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:30:13) - Once the eyes go to the eyes, where else they go in the painting?

 

Shelley Golden (00:30:18) - Well, it depends what you want them to see. Do you want them to see both? You want them to see your clothing? Do you want them to see your background? Do you want them to see your logo on your possibly virtual background. So that's something that you can look at as well. So one of the things that I just did for I don't know if any of the viewers can actually see this, but yeah, we can see.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:30:47) - You suddenly become a lawyer. So and if I'm not listening to this on YouTube, then definitely go watch this interview on YouTube because there are tons of visual references. And I know I said this in the beginning, but I want to make sure that this is like the you if you're listening to this midway, you're like, what is she seeing? Definitely go on a YouTube.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:31:08) - Watch this on YouTube because you will see the visual references and it will be so much clearer in that space.

 

Shelley Golden (00:31:15) - Yeah. So this is a virtual background I created for an attorney. And if you notice there are two intersecting lines that meet at my eyes. I'll walk you through them. So I created the virtual background. It looks like I'm sitting at a desk in a lawyer's office with a few books with his brand on the wall. It's a light colored wood paneled wall, horizontal paneling versus vertical paneling. But on the top corner, one top corner, I have the. Attorneys logo his name in his logo. On the opposite diagonal, I have just a hint of a green plant, and if you connect the dots, you'll make a tic tac toe with my eyes directly in the middle of that diagonal. There's also another diagonal I put in on a shelf, an empty shell of the legal. The balance. That kind of the image of law. Justice. Her name? Yes, justice with the balance of the of the scales.

 

Shelley Golden (00:32:27) - And then that's up my top. Right. But then if I go take the other diagonal on the other way, I have also another plant which can catch her eye or some blue law books. In other words, my eyes are now in the middle of a second diagonal, which makes a cross and x directly in the middle of the zoom box. So it's forcing you to look at my eyes.

 

Kimberly Spencer (00:32:55) - And you also had that beautiful pop of pink shirt that you're wearing. So it definitely has you standing out in the, in the foreground.

Shelley Golden (00:33:04) - Right. So let's talk about clothing for a little bit. Yeah I just wanted again bring up another visual for your for for those who are able to see this visually. So this is another example of a zoom makeover by getting the correct camera angle. So your head is in the right place not it. With she's in her storage room. This is a place in her house that she was relegated to. We created a really an illusion of a lovely home office.

Shelley Golden (00:33:38) - And if you look the top of the leaves, her dark, dark, dark brown eyes and dark eyebrows and the door handle create a diagonal. One diagonal there that's causing you again to to look straight through that subliminal line right to her eyes. But notice the color of her clothing. It stands out in the foreground, and mind you, the bicycles are still in the storage room or storage shelves and boxes are still in there. You just don't see them. So this is making a few adjustments. Moving the furniture at buying some lights, buying a plant, bringing some professional artwork furniture and so that it really looks looks really top notch professional. All right. Let's talk about clothing for a little bit.

Kimberly Spencer (00:34:28) - Yes. And I think that clothing there's so much I love that we're talking about subliminal messages. Right. Because there's there's subliminal lines of directing the eyesight of the viewer. And there's something that I've been speaking to my clients recently about is there's who you are and that who you're perceived to be. And ideally, you want them to match.

Shelley Golden (00:34:54) - Yeah, exactly. As I say to my clients, my image consulting clients is I've been an image consultant for, I'm just going to say 20 plus years. And if we're doing color consultations, you want to wear the colors that really are your best color so that you and your clothing walk in the room the same time. If you don't wear the right color clothing and you're like, oh my God, who's that? Look at that yellow thing walking in. Oh my God, it's Jojo. But you don't want you don't want people to say that. You want to say, wow, look at Jojo. Doesn't she look amazing in that color? Versus oh my God, look at that color walking in the room. It's Jojo. Oh, I didn't even see. I didn't even notice because the color over powering. Yeah overpower her. So so on zoom. Okay, here's the lesson. Hang tight. The camera picks up white and light first, brings it to the foreground and darkens everything else.

Shelley Golden (00:35:58) - So it's always a balance of light and dark. Light walls, dark walls, dark dark walls. Light light clothing, dark clothing, light walls. Here's the room.

Kimberly Spencer (00:36:10) - In high light walls dressed in brighter colors.

Shelley Golden (00:36:15) - Right? Basically, the rule is no white, no blood, no white clothing, no black clothing. I'll tell you why. So white clothing. We'll catch the eye of the camera first in a little white and everything. It'll whiten the whites and it'll darken everything else, even if it's not dark. Just because it's almost like having too much light in the camera, it'll. So it will auto darken. And the reason you don't want to wear white so much for that reason is that not only will the camera, but the viewers, I will look at the white first and not your eyes. You want people to look at your eyes and your face first, torso second. So don't wear white because that's where they'll look first. If you wear black, navy blue, dark brown, dark and you know a lot of colors appear different only when you're on zoom.

Shelley Golden (00:37:11) - But we're black, you actually become a black hole and your body language gets a little bit lost unless you have a perfectly white wall behind you. So I advise wearing solid colors. I advise staying away from large patterns. You can wear medium size to small patterns. It's okay what you do not want. You do not want to wear plaids. You do not want to wear busy, busy patterns. And for guys, guys, even though this is mostly women, but you never know who's going to be listening to this, 20% are men. I got here.

Kimberly Spencer (00:37:51) - We got some princes who are being.

Shelley Golden (00:37:54) - I'm standing. You don't want to wear really thin striped shirts because the camera cannot focus in. In pixelate all the stripes. So what happens is you have what they call a moiré effect. It almost looks like it's moving in. The stripes are moving a little bit like it's vibrating. So best to wear solid colors that are different from the colors behind you.

Kimberly Spencer (00:38:23) - Mm. That's that's just basic rule of thumb.

Kimberly Spencer (00:38:27) - And it's like he's eliminated now. Like half my wardrobe because I mostly wear white and black.

Shelley Golden (00:38:33) - Me too. I'm basically a black and white girl. So I got my zoom uniform. And this is actually one of my new zoom uniform blouses. And I'm just going to a little a little tip, just F.Y.I. So as an image consultant, I shop with clients of all different budgets, all different styles. And a couple of weeks ago I went into Zara. So this is October of 2022. I went into Zara, which I don't normally shop there, but I went in and they have all of these solid colored, nice kind of tailored blouses and mostly polyesters, but they have. This is like a satin blouse. They have different colors for different skin tones and I'm like outstanding Mizzou uniform. So I bought two. My client bought two other colors. They're just as they're solid colored. Easy peasy. Wear it. You know and it's just a little tip to. Another tip that that I think is important for women who are on zoom is you want to stitch on some of your, your neck and your chest a little bit.

Shelley Golden (00:39:52) - So whether I have a blouse that's kind of in a V, a kind of open V, and Kimberly has more of a boat neck that's off one shoulder, one of the reasons you want to actually show some of your neck and your chest, as opposed to wearing a turtleneck or something, like a round neck just all the way up to your neck. Again, it opens the eye to say, look down my body at my body language. It's opens it up. Whereas if everything were completely closed you, it's a little bit more like drawing a line in the sand. We've got a head up here and some other color down there. It's not. It's not combining the head and the torso.

Kimberly Spencer (00:40:40) - Rest of the body.

Shelley Golden (00:40:42) - It helps with nonverbal communication.

Kimberly Spencer (00:40:46) - And now that you bring that to mind, it does make so much sense. Like it really does. And I think that the the ability to see because I know I have some clients who are like, but I have like a large chest or a smaller chest and it's it's not about I don't think it's about the size of your cleavage.

Kimberly Spencer (00:41:05) - It's about having that décolletage. I think this is what's called just the, the neck and also being able to see the, the skin and have that. I think it also. For me, the subconscious perception is that openness and sense is its openness. Because when immediately I felt the difference and again, why you need to go watch the YouTube version of this podcast because it's epic. You will feel the difference. When Shelley pulled her shirt up and around her neck like a turtleneck, it definitely gave an impression of much more closed off and versus the nice looseness of the neck allows for you feeling a bit more rapport and that openness and connection. So I love the fact that you're bringing all of these little details, but like I said, masterful pieces. And I know that. I know that you had a couple other things that you wanted to shift around this background, and I'm just so curious and itching to know what those things were. So looking you. She already moved multiple eyes, so we had horse eyes and we had a skull eyes that we turned so that we didn't have skull eyes.

Kimberly Spencer (00:42:21) - Yeah. And and then there are some plants on one side. Would you have opened it out a little farther and like, move up. Great box over a little bit.

Shelley Golden (00:42:32) - Um, I would probably. First of all, I'd lower the larger plant down a little bit so that it can create the horse head, your head and the plant a little bit smaller, and also bring that plant a little bit lower. And I would actually bring the horse artwork a little bit higher.

Kimberly Spencer (00:42:53) - Higher. Oh see that.

Shelley Golden (00:42:55) - You can even have it half out of the the zoom screen. There's nothing wrong with actually having a portion of a piece of art showing you don't have to have the whole thing. And so it looks like this perfect set. That's not necessary. But what's necessary is that it's balanced and there's no distractions. That's the most important.

Kimberly Spencer (00:43:18) - Yeah. The distractions. I think the eyeballs was such an awareness piece of the distractions of eyes. What are like 2 or 3 other common distractions that you typically see.

Shelley Golden (00:43:28) - All right. I'm going to show you another clothing tip okay. Again this is for for those who are watching visually it'll have more impact I'll try to walk it through. So for those of you who wear like cardigans and jackets, even if it's like a hoodie that has a front closing. And that's front closing. You're going to wear something under it. My suggestion to you is to always I'm going to show a little example using a piece of white paper. But if you wear a white tank or shell underneath it, what happens? I'm not even knowing what I'm doing over here because I'm not looking at myself. If you can see a little bit of white under, say you have a jacket and.

Kimberly Spencer (00:44:15) - Uh huh.

Shelley Golden (00:44:15) - What happens is it forces your eye to look from my eye down my body because again, the camera picks up white and light. Now, if you had a black shell or black tank or t shirt or top underneath, what happens is the opposite. Okay, I'm going to turn this around.

Shelley Golden (00:44:40) - So again you have a cardigan a jacket. And now your eye stops right here. Um, even though I happen to have this very, very bright fuchsia top on with bad lighting now, but it forces your eye. Even if I had this up a little bit to stop. At the top of the black shell and it doesn't. It acts like a black hole. Again. The camera picks up white and light, so if you have white and light, it's going to bring it down. Dark stops things in their tracks if you have dark furniture behind you, if you have a dark bookcase, if you have dark books on your bookcase, it acts like a black hole. And I often tell people, let's rearrange your bookshelf shelf by shelf by shelf and get rid of those dark books. Sometimes you want to group color books together. I also create that subliminal line by taking books from the outer side of your zoom window, from tallest to shortest, with the shortest closest to your face. It acts like another subliminal line.

Shelley Golden (00:45:57) - If you stack your books, or you place your books on your bookshelves behind you from tallest to shortest.

Kimberly Spencer (00:46:06) - I think. Shelley, it's so brilliant. I just, I see, I see the work of because we've, we're all very familiar with subliminal messages and we've heard of different types of subliminal messages and subliminal lines like, what is the message that your zoom box is creating that's saying what you want it to say, like ensuring that you are who you are and who you are being perceived as are going to be the same thing. And I think that that's why the work with you, Shelley, is so important. I mean, I know I've sent a couple of clients to you already and definitely always will be sending you more because I love your detail. I love the attention to detail. I love how you explain why. And like it's not just it's not just, oh, just wear this and don't wear that. And here's not giving the reason, but as soon as you say why and you showed the demonstration between the white underlay and the black, you feel this difference of openness versus a little bit more closed off.

Kimberly Spencer (00:47:13) - And there is an actual perception that you can feel when things shift in the environment that you're creating in the screen, in the image. I mean, when you think of a movie, there's a reason why we have set dressers on movies, like they don't just like throw something up and like, shoot it. Like there are consistently messages and films being communicated so that every piece of that film is enhancing the story of what's being told. So is the story that's being told in your zoom box, which we all are going to be on. Let's face it, zoom is not going anywhere like that. We're all going to be on for a while. Is a story, one that is communicating you standing in your power, owning your throne, really showing up authentically and having that message be something that's very similar to how you perceive yourself to be.

Shelley Golden (00:48:08) - That's all about branding. How do you want to brand yourself and what does branding? How people remember you? And if you walk the walk and talk the talk.

Shelley Golden (00:48:18) - People remember will remember you supposedly kind of coming and going, you know, you know, if you're walking the walk and talking the talk. So it's really, really important because sometimes how many times have you like spoken to somebody and they have a great message, but there's a real disconnect on how they show up on zoom.

Kimberly Spencer (00:48:37) - Yes.

Shelley Golden (00:48:38) - Like they might be super brilliant and they have this horrible, maybe virtual background or they just have they're in a mess, you know, or they're home and they're, you know, like they're in their bedroom and they still didn't make their bed yet. And you know, like, really like, and you really want, you know, to give me a loan for X dollars or hundreds of thousands or millions of dollars and you haven't made your bed behind you yet. Really. So, so it's it's about branding and then kind of like once you decorate your home. It's kind of done. You know what needs to be done, how the flow goes. And you can you could tweak it thereafter.

Shelley Golden (00:49:18) - But once you get all these components situated and for my zoom makeovers, I have this five step process. So we talk again. We talk about camera and camera angle. Also what brand the camera. Well how would you what are your settings on zoom. How do you have it paired up? What your sound, what your microphone. How do you have the settings. So we so camera sound, lighting background what color clothing works best on you. And like I say zoom specific makeup but that maybe will save for another another time. Although there are some women that are just how do I do zoom makeup? It's a little bit like stage makeup. It's not the way you put it on on the street, because you need more of it. And what we're doing with the zoom specific makeup techniques is I'm trying to create a three dimensional look on this two dimensional platform, and that's why I try to create kind of a foreground, sometimes a mid-ground and a background, so that it feels like we're more in a three dimensional space as opposed to this two dimensional platform, just so it feels more like you're sitting across the table having a conversation.

Shelley Golden (00:50:33) - Yeah, that's what I tried.

Kimberly Spencer (00:50:35) - That's. And you do it so expertly. Well, Shelley like it? Really? I've seen the transformations that you've had with my clients that I know, like. And I think that here's the other piece that I love that you bring to the table is you work with what you've got. Like, I know one of my clients, she just moved. And so she's getting new furniture and she's getting things, but she doesn't yet have the furniture. And so you've got some things stacked on boxes and whatnot, but you're using what you have, and it's what they call movie magic. I mean, like what I have, I got two apple crates and and I just moved the, the nightstand in order to approach this and my that. My desk is the bed, but that that was what I had to use. And so I in this small area Airbnb that didn't have like an office area. So it doesn't have to be this expensive transformation thing. You don't have to go out and buy a whole bunch of other things.

Kimberly Spencer (00:51:34) - I know a logic Pro camera can run anywhere between 50 and 100 bucks, so it doesn't have to be a big expensive thing, but it the you can have the perception of expense, the perception of a wealthier perception. When you look at how your branding is and how you're showing up and how you're remembered.

Shelley Golden (00:51:55) - Exactly. You know? And here's a simple, easy trick make sure you take a little cloth, usually like an eyeglass cloth, and clean the lens of your camera. It makes a difference. Very simple. I mean, who to thank, right? You know, if your friends. There's dust on it. Just click camera lens. You know.

Kimberly Spencer (00:52:16) - Unless you want the Barbara Walters filter.

Shelley Golden (00:52:20) - I'm like, you know, going down just a few more wrinkles, you know? Yeah.

Kimberly Spencer (00:52:27) - So, Shelley, we are about at the end, and I just I have a little bit of rapid fire to wrap things up. Are you. Are you ready?

Shelley Golden (00:52:35) - Shoot.

Kimberly Spencer (00:52:37) - Who is your favorite female character in a book or a movie and why?

Shelley Golden (00:52:42) - Oh, you have asked a very challenging question.

Shelley Golden (00:52:45) - I don't really have a favorite favorite female character, to be honest with you. Um. I'm pretty kind of holistic, you know? I think there are many, but. So don't have one.

Kimberly Spencer (00:53:00) - Ah, who would you. Woman would you want to trade places with? Just for a day?

Shelley Golden (00:53:05) - Michelle Obama.

Kimberly Spencer (00:53:06) - Oh, she has them running. She has got definitely the running total.

Shelley Golden (00:53:11) - Oh, yeah.

Kimberly Spencer (00:53:12) - Yeah.

Shelley Golden (00:53:13) - You know, like, okay. You know, in heaven she's not in a movie and, you know, in a book. Mean I just think Michelle is just awesome. We're also born and I'm also from Chicago. You know, I think we're a year apart. Born around the same time. So similar sentiments. I. And I just think she is wonderful. She she has created a movement and I think she, she has a huge heart.

Kimberly Spencer (00:53:42) - Amazing. Yeah I agree and I think what what is your morning routine that sets you up for success?

Shelley Golden (00:53:50) - Well, since I'm, I tend to go to bed a little later.

Shelley Golden (00:53:53) - I'm trying to sleep a little later in the morning, unless I have a meet, an online meeting or a presentation that I'm giving. So I try to sleep, you know, and try to get in eight hours. Um, I watch the news. I make a pot of tea because I am a junkie. I have on my second and third cup second part of the day. What kind of tea? Uh, usually a black tea, but I make my own chai mix that I've been making for ten years, and I put a little bit of chai mix in and some sweetener, and right now I have almond milk. So I kind of make a little bit of a chai, you know, Indian chai every day and oh, very important. Usually when I wake up, I do like yoga stretches in bed with my blinders on. So I'm stretching my hips because I've had a sciatica for years. So stretching my back and my hips and my legs. And it also acts as a little bit of a meditative time.

Shelley Golden (00:54:59) - Okay, what's my day? What do I need in my day going? Um, and so that kind of brings me from La La Land into into reality.

Kimberly Spencer (00:55:10) - Mm. Beautiful. And what is her nighttime routine? And you said you stay up a little late. Um, what is your nighttime routine to set you up for success in the morning?

Shelley Golden (00:55:20) - No. Well, if I shower in a nighttime shower so that I can wash my hair and I can flatten out the back. What made me sleeping so don't look like I have a helmet head. And because that's that's not a good look. Um, on Boomer. Otherwise, the helmet head is not my favorite look, but nighttime routine. Um. It varies. Sometimes I work really late. Um, when I'm tired, I go to sleep. So if I read a book, I'm like, after two pages, I'm done. So sometimes that's that's fatal because I'm already fallen asleep while I'm reading on page one, so I don't sometimes I like to watch the news and mentally prep for the next day.

Shelley Golden (00:56:07) - What do I have going on in the next day? Who am I speaking to? What mood do I need to be in? What what do I need to prep? And so professionally, that's I'm always thinking of who am I speaking to? What am I doing? Because for what I do, um, you know, I have to walk the walk and talk and talk. That's really important. I can't just say, you know, I'm having a bad hair day and wear a baseball cap. That that just doesn't work. Oh, yeah.

Kimberly Spencer (00:56:38) - You definitely. Every time I have seen you and every time we've spoken, I know I've been in coffee shops from time to time or in my office or in my office in Australia.

Shelley Golden (00:56:49) - Something.

Kimberly Spencer (00:56:50) - But in like, you definitely walk the walk consistently with what you preach, what you teach, and you have absolute congruence in that. And I absolutely honor and love that about you and how you show up for your business, I really do. That's that's a testament to who you are and the integrity that you hold for what you do.

Shelley Golden (00:57:10) - Oh, thank you, thank you. So two.

Kimberly Spencer (00:57:12) - Hard questions. And what do you define to be your kingdom or queendom.

Shelley Golden (00:57:18) - Oh. Well, that's, um. I'm really a very international person. I lived in Europe. I lived in Amsterdam, in Abu Dhabi for 15 years. And when I moved back to the States, I lived in New York and Boston for another 7 or 8 years. And so I consider myself a very international person. I have one child of mine is Chinese, the other one is French. And, um, and so I consider the whole world my kingdom. I just really my, my ex, who grew up moving around the world, considers himself a citizen of the world. And I'm not from California, although I live here now. I just really consider myself like an American with lots of international connections. Um, so terms of kingdom, my kingdom, my five dumb, you know, whatever it is. Um, I really have very long fingers and long tentacles.

Shelley Golden (00:58:23) - Um.

Kimberly Spencer (00:58:24) - I love that. And lastly, Shelley, how do you crown yourself?

Shelley Golden (00:58:28) - How do I crown myself? Oh, kind of question is that.

Kimberly Spencer (00:58:32) - You know, I'm going to be taking completely metaphorically. It can be taken however you choose to take.

Shelley Golden (00:58:37) - Oh, no, of course I know. I call this sometimes. I call myself assorted queens. I could be the queen. Queen of camouflage when I'm working with, like, image consulting clients, because everybody has a little something they need to camouflage, hang over saddlebags, you know, whatever it is. Muffin tops. So, Queen of camouflage. I'm also the textile queen because I actually studied textile. Now I know textiles really, really well. So I'm kind of, you know, the queen of image consulting. You know, I just kind of that's that's kind of how I, how I crown myself. I've been doing this for a long time, and I have lots of, as I say, I have a really narrow niche, but it's really deep in that niche.

Shelley Golden (00:59:26) - So that's kind of where I crown myself.

Kimberly Spencer (00:59:28) - You are a testament to mastery, and I think so many like one of the things I so admire about you, aside from just you walking the talk, is that that that level of mastery that you've cultivated, which is actually surprising. Like, it's pretty rare that most people have a broad range of things that they're very that they're that they're good at, but they don't get really niche and focus on that, like those few things that they just absolutely expert in. And you are you go deep and it is it is beautiful like the level of detail. And I'm going to say intrinsic. Intrinsic. I don't think that's the word that I'm looking for. It starts with an eye. It's not it's not coming to me. But you just have this level of depth in your knowledge. That is absolutely amazing. And I send everyone I can to work with you, who definitely needs a zoom upgrade because there are many people.

Shelley Golden (01:00:25) - On the other hand, I'm actually flying to Denver this weekend for a three day wham bam image overhaul for a new client.

Kimberly Spencer (01:00:35) - Amazing.

Shelley Golden (01:00:36) - We're console closet shopping, and then we'll continue with the rest via zoom afterwards. But it's going to be a three day image overhaul with I love it.

Kimberly Spencer (01:00:48) - I love it. So lastly Shelley, how do we work with you? How do we get to know you? I mean, aside from all the referrals that I direct your way.

Shelley Golden (01:00:56) - But.

Kimberly Spencer (01:00:57) - How do how do we how do our audience come to work with you?

Shelley Golden (01:01:00) - Which I am. It's been awesome meeting you. And I love working with your clients. They are really awesome. If you want to get in touch with me, you can find me. My my website is Shelley Golden style. Make sure you put the E before the Y in the Shelley. So it's Shelley. Shelley Golden style. And if you want to email me, it's Shelley at Shelley Golden style. Com and you can find me that way if you can't remember my name, just Google Zoom Makeover and I will pop up because there's nobody else doing the zoom makeover, so I'm it.

Kimberly Spencer (01:01:40) - Yep. Thank you so much. All of the descriptions for Shelley's details are in the description of this podcast as always, so you can click on them. Go work with Shelley, get your zoom makeover, show up as the professional queen king that you are so that people see you as in that sovereign leadership role. Because you may have the best skills in the planet. You may be the best, most undiscovered secret for success. But unless people perceive you as being that authentic leader, that is where branding comes in. And so be be the leader that you are. As always, my fellow sovereigns on your throne, mind your business because your reign is now.

Kimberly Spencer (01:02:25) - Catch you next time.

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